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why do good days end in lows? why is that necessary?

londongrimshaw:

[falls in the shower] parkour

witchyhellbroth:

pinenolanapple:

it takes 237 muscles to fake an orgasm but 15 to say “it’s called a clitoris and it’s right here”

#don’t ever fake an orgasm let them know they disappointed you

last social interaction: 8 days ago

next potential social interaction: 9 days time

bastardlybrendan:

taskscape:

i-will-lift-you-higher:

ambientheif:

jackthemother:

So this happened on facebook today….

BOOM

Thank god someone said it. You cannot fuck a vagina loose yo. Anatomy doesn’t work like that.

people that do not understand vaginas should not be allowed near one

"these days it’s true though!"

TELL ME JACOB
TELL ME OF THE OLDEN DAYS
TELL ME OF THE 1930s WHEN VAGINAS WERE AS TIGHT AS AN ANUS
TELL ME OF HOW THE FEMALE OF THE SPECIES HAVE DEGRADED INTO HORRIBLE SEEPING MONSTERS WITH GAPING CAVERNS THESE DAYS. 
TELL ME OF YOUR WISDOM.

theimpalaslovechild:

and in that moment, everyone’s heart broke.

Got my new laptop, but when I try to download torrents, it just connects to peers and does nothing more and keeps downloading SearchProtect Conduit.

Help me.

"Don’t ever compliment me by insulting other women. That’s not a compliment, it’s a competition none of us agreed to."

- (via linunea)